Incomplete talk

In past few days, I have been thinking about my personal and professional life. Both are quite unpredictable. And sometimes both are boring. Sometimes I think that I am the most bored person around and sometimes, I contradict myself. Just because i enjoy more in a situation in which i am. No other person can have a feel good smile in a situation where I am. This is me. I take everything as a challenge. I find fun from everything around and make myself a happy person. Sometimes everything around looks funny to me and may be others find a funny part of mine. 

Anyway, I was talking about past few days, isn't it? No, I guess about my personal and professional life, which keeps me waiting always. I am not complaining about both, but I know that some part of it is destiny and some part of it is what I am responsible for. 

My personal life could have been better  and struggle free but I chose happiness over money. I chose such a profession for myself in which only struggle is there. And I am struggling from last few years without any success. Though, I am confident of my success, I am waiting. Waiting for something good to happen in my life. Something to cheer about and party for. May be destiny wants me to wait some more. 

Let's not talk much about professional. I am not a professional kind of person. My profession is a very important part of my personal life. That's my passion. Other than my passion, a lot of things are there who is letting me wait. For which I am trying, may be not so hard, but without any success. Yes, I accept, it could have been a better try. 

First, I am fed up of my skinny look. I want to gain some wait these days and am trying for this too but not succeeding. Isn't it funny. You may not find anything funny in my look, but I do sometimes. 

My friends are a very important part of my life. And only here, I am lucky a little. I have got some very good friends, but they can not be with me always. They have their own life. 

So, ultimately, it comes to my life only. My empty life but not so empty heart. There is a sweet, beautiful angel in there. the one who is my inspiration. The one who is my passion. The one without whom I am incomplete. Yes, she is in my heart but still far away from life. Though, not so far away but at a considerable distance.

I am waiting for her. But this could have been different, I know. My mistakes are, I never tried. I know that hacking an account, calling blankly or writing poems about her is not going to work anyway. If I claim to love her, then I have to show up. But at the same time, I am dumb at showing up. I am dumb enough to propose her, may be because I am afraid. I am the last person who can impress her with his looks. I am worst when I talk to her. But this is me. I can't change. I can't change for anything. May be because, i don't want to change. May be because my not so perfect personality loves her and don't want to change this feeling for any mean. There may be many reasons but one fact is I love her. And I will keep waiting for her. 

I do wrong talks at wrong times. But I can't help it. If I am talking then I can't stop talking about her. My talks and My life is incomplete without that name. Sorry, I will not tell you that name. It's all private....;)

https://www.facebook.com/pages/I-Wish-life-gives-me-one-more-chance/528617000524006